I Found Something On My Neck And I’m Nervous As F@#$

So it’s been awhile since I’ve been to any doctor. The only time I go is if there’s an emergency because I’m in so much pain, I can’t handle it anymore. I know it’s bad but I just hate everything about those places. It’s cold, all white walls (which I love in any other situation) and although the women at this office were amazing, I still can’t stand it. I used to be so good and always on top of all my check ups. As I get older, I think I just get more stubborn.

Ok, so here’s the story. Thursday I woke up from a dream and I had my hand on my neck. I don’t remember what the dream was about but when I moved my hand, I felt something. Immediately I thought “what the F is that and is this real or am I still asleep?”. I kind of started to panic a little as I realized there was a dime sized lump on my neck. Luckily I didn’t freak out too much and start WedMD’ing the shit out of it but it was on my mind all weekend. I traveled to Michigan that day so I did my best to not think about it. Come Monday, back in LA, I knew this would break my four year run of not seeing the doctor because honestly, I started to get really scared. I got so lucky in finding the perfect doctor who I will now see regularly, as she had to remind me I’m 30 and it’s important at my age to stay on top of these things. Gee…thanks doc!

So I went in, she did a quick feelski, and told me I need an ultrasound. Ugh, I was so hoping it was a swollen lymph node but we can’t be too careful with this stuff, right? I don’t smoke, I eat healthy for the most part, I workout at least 4 days a week (sometimes 7) so what the hell is this? Friday I get an ultrasound and I’m crossing my fingers results don’t take more than 3 days. I don’t know how people wait weeks for this stuff. I’m a nervous wreck and for all I know, it’s just a tiny little calcium deposit. Although this is minor, I still can’t help but think of what it could be. This chick needs yoga in her life to calm the F down.

Word of advise. Never ever go four years without seeing a doctor. Even if nothing is wrong, make sure you always have regular check ups. The only person that will take care of you is you. Don’t let yourself down. Ok….wish me luck!

(photo location: Culver City, California)


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